This was a video supplement for Lesson #1269 - Coping With Christmas Carol Fatigue - but let’s be honest, who doesn’t want to hear a good raptor carol regardless of the reason the video was made?
About
Dante Shepherd writes the daily webcomic Surviving the World.This Monday Night Campfire is for stories and other general means of amusement. So gather 'round and remember that singing comes from the patella region.
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(All content © Dante Shepherd unless otherwise noted.)
This was a video supplement for Lesson #1269 - Coping With Christmas Carol Fatigue - but let’s be honest, who doesn’t want to hear a good raptor carol regardless of the reason the video was made?
Do You Smell What I Smell
(to the tune of “Do You Hear What I Hear”)
Said the raptor to another one
Do you smell what I smell?
Wafting in the air, raptor friend
Do you smell what I smell?
A child, a child
Shivers all alone
Let us eat his meat off the bone
Let us eat his meat off the bone
(Source: survivingtheworld.net)
Oh Please No
(to the tune of “Let It Snow”)
Oh the raptor outside is frightful
(the sound of a doorknob opening)
(the sound of screams)
(the sound of evisceration)
(silence)
(Source: survivingtheworld.net)
Raptor Wenceslas
(to the tune of “Good King Wenceslas”)
Raptor Wenceslas looked down
At his feast of Stephen
Whose bones were all strewn around
And meat would be eaten
Brightly shown the teeth to bite
Glistening with drool
Into Raptor’s meal that night
Celebrating yule
(Source: survivingtheworld.net)
Raptors Around The Christmas Tree
(to the tune of “Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree”)
Raptors around the Christmas tree
Why oh why d’you let them in
You are the prey that they can see
Now their dinner shall begin
You will get a strange and hopeful feeling
When you hear
Voices screaming right behind you
Their meat might slow down a raptor or two
Raptors around the Christmas tree
Have a grisly holiday
Everyone’s running frantically
In a doomed and desperate way
(Source: survivingtheworld.net)
O Raptor Pack
(to the tune of “O Christmas Tree”)
O raptor pack, o raptor pack
Here comes my disemboweling
O raptor pack, o raptor pack
Here comes my disemboweling
I thought that I
Could run and hide
Forgot you attack from the side
O raptor pack, o raptor pack
Here comes my disemboweling
(Source: survivingtheworld.net)
Raptors Are Coming
(to the tune of “Christmas Is Coming”)
Raptors are coming
All children should beware
If a pack gets your scent
Then you have no prayer
If you can befriend a raptor
You’ll have an awesome pet
Train him not to eat the neighbor
And you’ll both be set
(Source: survivingtheworld.net)
